DNF in Mont Blanc

To protect my body I have a rule of thumb in races. I will never continue in an event if I feel I could be potentially permanently damaging a body part. Despite being highly goal oriented, I respect my body and am constantly amazed at what it will let my mind coerce it into doing.

So when at 80K into the 158k brutal Tour du Mont Blanc Trail Ultra I felt my chronically bogus Achilles tendon start to yell, "This is now BAD PAIN - I'm not messing around any more!" I figured I better assess my options.

As an athlete it’s vital to learn the difference between "good" pain and "bad" pain. Bad pain could turn into an irreparable situation and potentially alter one's athletic life. The good pain is the kind we deal with daily in training.

I've experienced enough good pain in various volumes to last a few lifetimes. Good pain is something I am comfortable in – it’s a familiar and potent teacher and we can reap huge lessons from her if we listen well.

Pushing through bad pain is not a courageous act as our society would like to emphasize. Bad pain is plain stupid.

When I made choice to drop out today I knew I made the right call in the grand scheme of my athletic life. But I still sat down in a meadow near a small mountain hut in the shadows of the storybook picturesque Alps and cried. Grieving loss is healthy and not completing this amazing course feels like a big loss.

I've made my way back to Chamonix and the finish line to watch runners coming in. It seemed important for me to feel the celebration and to remind myself that to have more finish lines like this one I needed to make the decision I did today. There's always another race if we choose.

The Tour du Mont Blanc Trail Ultra in an impressive event. Though I felt like I was racing through Braille with the language barrier, I was impressed with their organization and execution on all levels. Definitely a world class event.

That said, the course is purely brutal. This event makes Western States 100 look like a walk in the woods. Our first big climb of the race was about 4500 feet steep, unrelentingly straight up to 8000 feet in the cold mountain air. It took me about two+ hours to complete this ascent and that doesn't include the knee breaking descent straight down the mountain on slippery rocks and dirt. This was the first of eight climbs similar in difficulty. It was huge with an unprecedented view. Excellent combo. Huge.

I feel privileged to have experienced even a taste of this race and Chamonix has definitely taken a piece of my heart.

Back at you from home,
Terri

Tour du Mont Blanc Begins!

The Tour du Mont Blanc is a 158k circumambulation of the Mont Blanc Massif. The event moves through France, Italy, and Switzerland via a total elevation gain of 28,000 feet and various villages and mountain passes. Most folks hike/backpack the circuit over a period of 7+ days. Our aim in this race is to cover the distance in less than 45 hours.

The race organization will provide 30 aid stations/checkpoints along the way including two drop bag locations where we can pick up personal food or other needed items. We can not have crew or pacers and we're required to carry a small list of mandatory gear including; rain gear, space blanket, whistle, bandaids, two headlamps, spare batteries, passport, food, money and more.

The race starts in a few hours, at 7:00 pm here in Chamonix and I'm starting to get that familiar/gut reality check prior to a long event - the check is that I have to be moving forward for a day and two nights constantly. Eeeeeek.

My goals are: to work off all the excellent rich French food and wine I've been eating, complete the course so I can experience the entire route visually, take lots of pictures to save those visuals, complete the route with body and mind as intact as possible (this can have many interpretations) and, to finish in time to hobble on wasted legs and feet to the bus station for the start of my trip back to the States.

Wish me a short day...

Back at you post race.
Terri

What Country are We In?

During another mini-marathon of travel starting at 1:00 AM in Moscow, Russia, we touched down as I woke from a nap. Feeling a bit disoriented, I turned to my travel companion, Louise, and asked, "What country are we in?"

After a pause combined with glazed stare I realized Louise was as unclear as I on our arrival location. Three flights and three countries later, our initial glance into the new airport terminal at the helpful, smiling faces, the expedience of passport control, and the cleanliness of our surroundings, shouted that we weren't in Russia any more - quite the contrary - definitely Switzerland.

My traveler’s patience normally has a very very long fuse but Russia burned it quickly via the language barrier and the scolding, unhelpful Russian employees. I don't think "customer service" has yet become a part of their culture (even an anemic version). Despite excellent times with newfound climbing friends touring the Kremlin, Red Square, the ballet, and various museums and restaurants, my patience fuse and my stomach were quite happy to be in amiable Western Europe. I seem to have picked up intestinal bad guys on the mountain and am just now getting it sorted out. Maybe too much dill and ketchup (served on everything in Russia...)

We took the train from Geneva and the further southeast we went the more magical it became. From Martigny, Switzerland we transferred to the Mont Blanc Express and picked our way through the mountains via picturesque villages perched on mountainsides.

As we got closer to Chamonix the Mont Blanc Massif began to open to us. It is even more spectacular than I anticipated. From the architecture and food, to the people, Chamonix is a breath of fresh air and the scenery is amazing everywhere you look.

Our first day in Chamonix we took the Auguille du Midi Gondola ride up through the bowels of the Mont Blanc Massif over into Italy - I had to keep pinching myself to make sure it was all real. I brought my map and was able to pick out all the famous climbing routes I have read so much about. I tried to imagine Bonati climbing the first ascent of the Grandes Jorasses or the Dru - daunting, beautiful rock faces that set a precedent for mountaineering in Europe. I already know I need to come back here to play a bit in these historical and pristine mountains.

Other than a bit of hiking and running in between bouts of eating incredible food we've been relaxing with friend and mountain guide Vern Tejas. On his way to guide on Cho Oyu in Tibet, Vern came to Chamonix to hang for a bit, chat, have some fun, and talk about climbing Denali next spring... more adventures to come for sure :).

I'm a bit nervous about finishing the 158k given the stomach issues. My plan is to just take it 1k at a time and adlib - I seem to do well that way. The taste of what we've seen of the course thus far proves it will be very tough with a constant flow of eye candy. A perfect adventure combo.

I've been feeling very fortunate living this trip, just living. The more I experience the more I want to experience. Living life large definitely feeds me and that includes loving and caring for good friends and family. Solid life stuff. I'm very pleased I'll be home in time for Bob's memorial. Looking forward to connecting with you all.

Also anticipating drinking some good CA wine when I get back - though I must say the pastries are quite nice here... the French definitely know how to eat!

xoxo to all back home. Mary - give Gryphon a big hug for me!

Back at you soon from Chamonix,
Terri

From Russia - Ponderings of Life and Death

Life. After several days of acclimization, camaraderie, and Russian gastronomies, we woke at midnight to our clear, calm, summit day on Mt. Elbrus in southern Russia. Bundled in three solid layers to start our initial ascent, I had the privilege of a conversation with Migma Gelu Sherpa, a 26 year old Nepalese man who has summitted Everest five times. He was proud to share with me that his sister, at age 15 was the youngest female to summit Everest. Life. Auspicious life.

I've always been in love with the rhythm of steady movement. Whether it’s the forward stroke of an extended ocean paddle, the pulse in the legs over hours of constant movement on trail, or the purity in power as feet connects to turn the drive train of a bicycle, there is comfort in the simplicity of motion. The body draws strength to feed its strength.

Mountaineering has become a recent extension of my celebration of motion. Life affirmed in basic repetition. As we ascended Elbrus slowly I immediately connected with this essence; breathe, step, breathe, step. Body solid and relaxed I meditated on the affirming sound of dry snow crunching on metal, and silence.

Death. Several weeks prior on Elbrus, several climbers got caught in a storm and perished. Before our final summit push we came across some of their clothing clinging to a rock as if to mark their passing. I could feel my heart move loudly in my chest as I stood and glanced at the impromptu memorial.

The summit was welcoming with brilliant, clear views - rewarding us for our diligence in motion. Be smart, stay solid and the Mountain Gods may let you experience the prize.

The crux of our descent was a straightforward traverse on a steep ice/snow field. It was a spot I "noticed" on the way up. An increase in heart rate and reluctant glances down the extended, sweepy drop off definitely got my edge on.

Before heading down this spot our guide said in his halting English/Russian, "Of course, be very slow on this section. Many people die here."

Of course, I thought as we descended in the hot sun. With the thought of death lingering I placed my feet precisely and stopped often to knock the snow balls off the bottom of my crampons with my axe shaft.

Life. Mountaineering always seems to involve copious amounts of eating and post climb drinking and our dinner and vodka session was no exception. Celebrating our newfound friendships and our movement up the mountain affirmed the chance to try for another peak. These thoughts prompted songs, laughter and stories from all.

Death. After some challenging travel in a country that seems to reluctantly share basic information to aid English speaking travelers, I arrived in Moscow to news that a friend and all around solid human being, Bob Hebeler, died in a bike crash on a pristine mountain road in Santa Cruz, CA.

With a heavy heart my thoughts reach out to friends at home, his kids and wife - all of us left to somehow make sense, or not, of that slight precipice between life and death. It has always seemed strained and fruitless to try and justify or negotiate a premature death. We are then left to cope with our own lives without that person and perhaps somehow steep their essence upon our life choices.

Bob went out in a beautiful spot in the world, celebrating this life giving movement on his bicycle. From a distance, I like to think of him still riding indefinitely. Purity of movement in that strange juxtaposition of life and death.

I have an upcoming Ocean Swim Clinic in September that I shall dedicate to Bob. Perhaps together we can celebrate him through our continued movement, swimming, biking and running. Continued life to you Bob.

xoxo from Russia - back at you from France,
Terri

From Russia with Love

Four flights, three airlines and a day and a half later I arrived in Moscow, Russia sans my backpack with all my mountaineering gear. The extremely by the book, diligent, Russian airport workers decided that I needed to have my recovered pack sent to my room at 2:00 am. If I weren't brilliantly happy to see the gear intact, I would have passed out in the guy's arms. Can you say jet lag...

If there is any frustration that I get from international travel, its my lack of understanding of the underlying "way of being" of the culture into which I'm inserting myself. Every place, every country, every community has a way of acting, being, talking that is only known by those who participate in it. When we go abruptly to a novel place that is "particularly" foreign we are asking ourselves to try and fit in with no beta on what that underlying current looks like.

Places like China and Russia, that have made enormous social and economic changes in their environment in a relatively short period of time seem to be the most difficult to "figure out". Its as if their negotiation of a new climate (i.e. capitalism) as a disruption in their lifestyle spills over into the way they interact foreigners. Do I actually know that this is true? Not necessarily, but it feels like it.

I did have a wonderful conversation with my airport transport driver here in Moscow, who spoke impeccable English and who was more than happy to practice it on me. Due to the constant traffic here we had a solid 1.5 hours to chat and being the insatiably curious one, exploded questions on him. Too much to share in this short post, but I will say I learned more about Russian culture than I would have spending a month here solo. He tried to convince me that having a Russian boyfriend would greatly increase my chances of learning about the country - - pick up line I'd never quite come across before.

Off for another flight and bus ride tomorrow to get us to the Caucasus mountains in Southern Russia and the base of Mt. Elbrus. Extremely excited about the climb,the opportunity to meet some new climbing buddies and explore that part of Russia a bit. I'm not sure I'll be able to do email while I'm there, so I may need to update you on the climb upon my return to Moscow.

Back at you post climb!

From Russia with love,
Terri

Terri's next adventure....off to Russia and France

As usual, I spent a pre-dawn moment multi-tasking. Brush teeth, assess spider-web accumulation on the bathroom ceiling, fill water bottles, make toast and feed Gryphon. Within the easy whirl of early morning prep I paused to catch a glimpse in the mirror of my “morning face” as I remembered how much I enjoy getting up before the rest of the world on a Sunday. When I saw the face I smiled, remembering my upcoming adventure. This particular quote came to mind:

“A man sets out to draw the world. As the years go by, he peoples a space with images of provinces, kingdoms, mountains, bays, ships, islands, fishes, rooms, instruments, stars, horses, and individuals.
A short time before he dies, he discovers that the patient labyrinth of lines traces the lineaments of his own face.”
Jorge Luis Borges, Epilogue, The Maker

I’ve often viewed my wrinkles and face lines as being earned, like the virtues we gain as endurance athletes engaging again and again in the mêlée of self. We are drawn back again and again to the journey because the journey feeds us. It also leaves us with permanent trophies, gifts, maturity, life shifts, face lines. The lines are earned via our travels, our experiences, and the visions we gain while voyeuring through various countries, eyeing the hardship, toil and the strife of other cultures.

I also have seen my face lines as enterprising; that the experiences they represent offer a confidence from which to matter-of-factly state things like, “I think I’ll go climb a mountain in Russia. I’ve read of and always wanted to see Chamonix, France, a spectacular icon of adventure. I may as well do a race there while I’m in Europe - what a perfect way to see the mountains…”. And thus the planning begins. The seeds are planted, and further opportunity to draw the lines begins.


I’m off on the 8th for Min Vody, Russia via Moscow. I'll be climbing Mt. Elbrus in the Caucasus Mountain range which is nestled between the Black and Caspian Seas near the border of Russia and Georgia. Post climb and before heading to Chamonix, I’ll check out Moscow for a couple days and hit up the Bolshoi Ballet in my new black dress.

In Chamonix, on the border of France, and Italy, I'll have a few days to hang before doing the Tour Du Mont Blanc; a brutal 98 mile trail race through the Mont Blanc mountain range. During the race I’m looking forward to viewing the entire range from various angles. I'm psyched.

You can also get info on these events here:

Mt. Elbrus climb:

http://www.elbrus.org/images/climbing_photos.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caucasus_Mountains

Tour Du Mont Blanc:

http://www.ultratrailmb.com/page.php?page=Documents2

Would love to hear from you all while I am away!
Back at you from Eastern Europe…
xoxo
Terri